You were going to get fired anyway, from what I understand (because you are an asshole) You should have let it go. It's obvious you ain't getting jack shit & she added insult to your stupid ass by suing back for a dollar. (which she will frame & look at for years) to remind her of the piece of stupid slime you are.
Ok, if I was standing there beside her, I would of course be thinking, it would be sweet to feel that fine bottom. I'll admit it. But you went & did it. If that was me...I would have said, yeah...guilty as charged. I would have said I was sorry for being stupid & then forever more, I could say I got to touch it.
But you...Not only lost your job, you deny it happened. Then, you think you are going to get 3 million dollars for being a liar. (were your parents brother & sister?) Who would really take a chance on hiring you now?
Perhaps you can spin some records in some backwoods roller rink. Up next....Abba's dancing Queen...All skate.